One of the great lines in Top Gun is where Maverick(Tom Cruise) says over and over again, "I'm not leaving my wing-man". Pilots depend on each other and have strict procedures to ensure their safety and success of their mission.

Back in my scouting days, I had been hearing stories of Hatchet Harry. I was about 13 or so and these stories captured my imagination. He was an old hermit who lived in some caves above Lake Surprise at our Scout camp in North Jersey.  The stories came from the Camp Rangers son who was a bit of a rebel. No scout troop was able to keep him because he always seemed to find trouble, so I was told. Somehow he found me or his stories did anyhow.

I had just been promoted to Patrol Leader, kind of like a squad leader. I had a group of 7 or 8 scouts that I was responsible for and I was their leader, whatever that meant. I was to learn quickly what leadership meant.

I had never been to the camp before, at least not for a long weekend to camp. The first time I got there, we had to hoof it up a tall hill and do some hiking to get to our cabin. I doubt that cabin is there anymore, but I can see it like it was yesterday. I became the king of that cabin. On many trips to Aheka camp, I was completely at home there. But that first time, I threw my pack on one of the mattresses and hauled off with Rusty to look for Hatchet Harry. I was fearless and foolish all at the same time. I just didn't know it. We went zipping through the woods on over toward the lake, hundreds of feet below us. The view was spectacular but I wasn't there for the view. I was their to search for Harry with a Hatchet. Never found him. Found the caves where he supposedly lived. They were huge slabs of granite that had peeled off and fell below leaving large hollow spaces to call caves. No clothes, no campfire, no signs of life anywhere.

I was disappointed for sure. But I would soon know a deeper disappointment. As soon as I got back to camp, I was called to visit with the Scoutmaster. Mr Keppel was nice usually, even quiet and careful in his dealings with us scouts. He was calm this time as well as he informed me that what I had done was disturbing and unbecoming of a leader in his scout troop. I remember his brother was close by listening. He had just returned from Vietnam and had been through some tough times I believed.

That was a long weekend for me, I had plenty of time to think about leaving my squad or patrol behind and not making sure they were squared away before I took off on my wild goose chase. I probably blamed Rusty some, was angry with myself and finally accepted the idea that I was responsible for not acting responsibly. It's a lesson that has stuck with me ever since. Never leave those who are depending on you unless it is an emergency.

Tuesday night at the weekly Scout meeting, I was called into the back room, the scoutmaster and his brother and my father were in there. They took a pair of scissors and cut off my Patrol Leaders Stripes. That would be the last time I would fail those men. I made a vow at that point to always put those I was in charge of first. It wouldn't be long before I was a patrol leader again, even in charge of all the patrol leaders. My mistake was a great turning point in my life. I am grateful to those men.

I think Paul made a choice like this near the end of his life when he wrote;

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me.  Phil. 1:21-26

Paul actually says here that he desires to die and be with Christ. The deep conviction in his heart is that his death is not a dead end but a door into a great adventure. He actually can't wait for it and reaches out for it like it is the prize of his life, a great reward that has been coming for some time. I must confess that I don't normally think of death that way. In fact, I don't spend much time at all thinking about it. But Paul, so close to the executioners blade was so near to death that he knew it's hot breath on his neck for years.

And yet he chose to stay, to continue to serve. He couldn't leave his wing-man. He just couldn't do it. He would stay as long and serve as long as God would need him and he would do it because he was living in the Spirit, filled with Christ from within.

This mystical union of Christ and man, Spirit and Paul, is ours as well. Paul's words are ours as well. For Me to Live is Christ, To Die Is Gain. There are many powerful words in Scripture. These are among the most powerful. Paul had no fear in light of his daily life with an all powerful Christ. Death held no sting, nor any darkness. There are no monsters or calamities in death, Christ had already proved that to him. There was only a future framed by the face of a Christ with open arms calling him on the Damascus Road years earlier.

There may come a time when we will leave those we are called to care for. That is in God's hands. In the meantime, Christ is our life. As Paul wrote, To Live Is Christ. Get it on this weekend, and live, really live. Christ commands it.